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Chris is finally home again.

I’m married to a man who spends most of his weekdays travelling and sometimes, it’s difficult to connect.  Chris is home from Ireland but he will be flying in and out all September.  I can manage fine at home alone but I’m more myself when he’s near.

We’re better together. We need each other’s voice, touch and ear.

Life is sweeter when I do everything and absolutely nothing with Chris. I love to watch him build stuff and play his bass guitar. I love his eyes and his smile. I love his hugs and his jokes. So, when he’s gone, I truly miss his presence.

Life isn’t quite right when he’s away. Like I said, I can manage fine when he’s not here but “fine” isn’t enough for me.

It’s oneness and intimacy that I desire.

Oneness is God-breathed.

Chris and I “are no longer two, but one.” (Matthew 19.6 NIV)

Our oneness means commitment, communication, compatibility, care, encouragement, empowerment, nurturing, sacrifice, serving, sexual fidelity and growth. Our oneness requires constant effort to move close and be known. It only happens when Chris and I are open, honest, vulnerable and accountable to each other…

…and that takes time.

When there is little time, there is less communication.

When there is less communication, there is less listening.

When there is less listening, there is less understanding.

When there is less understanding, there is loneliness.

I can be in the same room as Chris and feel very lonely, if we aren’t connected. It’s painful, exhausting and heart-wrenching, so we always need to make time for us, regardless of life circumstances, commitments and distractions.

Husbands and wives, recognize that in marriage you have become one flesh. If you live for your private pleasure at the expense of your spouse, you are living against yourself and destroying your joy. But if you devote yourself with all your heart to the holy joy of your spouse, you will also be living for your joy and making a marriage after the image of Christ and His church.”  John Piper

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  1. Tears. Lump in my throat. You have touched on the very heart strings of true devotion. Commitment. Oneness. So sweet. So right. Unfortunately it sometimes takes twoness, threeness, fourness, fiveness and dare I say even moreness to finally arrive at ONENESS. But with God all things are possible. Thank you Diane, this is poignant and beautiful. May I use some excerpts for our upcoming 20th Anniversary vow renewal? Love to you and Chris- you are definitely AWESOME together! xo

    Stephanie Rourke Jackson FASHION Magazine, Weddingbells Account Manager Sent via my iPhone  416-843-2891 (please excuse typos!)

    • Thanks, Stephanie…kind words. Chris and I are looking forward to sharing that special night with you! Diane

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