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Here’s A Question

That could be me in the picture – the real me.

The me that isn’t in the spotlight. No speaking engagements. No teaching or tutoring. No telling stories. No organizing events or leading groups.

No performing.

The me who yearns to be sitting quietly on the couch in the room beside our kitchen, wearing flannel pyjama bottoms and one of my husband’s sweatshirts, feet up on the table, enjoying a cup of chai tea and being completely tuned into writing.

The me who needs solitude. Stillness. Like a soothing wave washing over me.

No need to be anybody but myself.

It takes so many years to figure out who we are, doesn’t it?

Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in you. Show me the way I should go, for to you I lift up my soul. Psalm 143.8

Don’t get me wrong – I enjoy speaking and teaching and tutoring and telling stories, organizing events and leading groups.

But when am I most “me”? 

This question has moved me deeply.

I’ve been thinking about it for weeks now. The answer helped me make the difficult decision to no longer pursue a mission trip to Africa. The answer made me reflect deeper than merely understanding personality inventories. The answer has moved me to continue on a healing journey that I began two years ago.

You have made known to me the path of life; you will fill me with joy in your presence, with eternal pleasures at your right hand.  Psalm 16.11

I have a file on my desktop entitled, “Good questions.”

Questions like:

Would you like you if you met you?

If you take the red pill, you become fluent in every spoken language. If you take the blue pill, you master every instrument in the world. Which one would you take and why?

Finish this sentence. “I can’t wait to…..

When’s the last time you did something for the first time?

I used to think ___________ but now I think ____________.

At what age did you become an adult?

The best part of waking up is ____________.

If we were all forced to wear a warning label, what would yours say?

When’s the last time you “burst with joy”?

(This is the most recent question I added to my file.) Tomorrow, you wake up as the opposite sex. What’s the first thing you would do?

But without question, the most intriguing question I have ever pondered . . . and I ask you  — “When are you most “you”?

Give it some thought. And some prayer. And some stillness.

It’s so worth your time.

How great is the love that father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are! 1 John 3.1a

 

 

 

 

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