Ugh! It happened again.
I’m so angry at myself for not submitting to the well-known, age-old warning signs that I was experiencing the night before. I know better. I’ve been having back spasms about twice/year for the past twenty-five years, ever since I stretched my upper body into the middle of the back seat of the car, at that totally unnatural angle, to get my son out of his car seat. I remember the strange sensation in the middle of my back and the subsequent, increasingly painful contractions that followed. The only way that I can explain the sensation is that it feels like I’m having “a baby in my back” – the contractions are exactly the same.
I admit it – yesterday morning, I was as stubborn as the contractions were hard.
I was scheduled for an 8.5 hour work day at the store so Chris reluctantly drove me to work, after strongly suggesting that I call in sick. My response?
“I can’t call in sick – there’s no one to replace me. I’ll be OK, Chris.”
I’m not stubborn – my way is just better……or not?
I worked from 9-2 and I couldn’t do it any longer. Between customers, I was either running to the dry-cleaning room to stretch over a big roll of newsprint or I was lying backwards on my exercise ball, behind the front counter. The toughest thing was serving the customers, while my back was in the middle of a contraction.
After five hours, I realized I was losing it. The “Aha” moment came when I went to the back room to look for some 8 x 11 inch painting canvasses and when there were none to be found, I broke into tears.
I needed help.
Chris came to pick me up and I spent the next nineteen hours flat on my back, having my husband periodically massage the inflamed area in my back, (I woke him up at 1:11 am. for this procedure) drugged up with muscle relaxants and laying on a cold pack on and off.
I couldn’t do a thing but lay still.
This morning, at about 11:00 am, the contractions stopped. Apparently, I slept right through the phone call from my boss, who kindly told Chris to pass on the message that “If that happens again, just close up the store, leave a note on the door, go home and rest.”…..which I have to admit, is EXACTLY what my husband had lovingly suggested earlier in this crisis.
I have never thought of myself as a stubborn person but when I came across a telling quote this morning, I felt like I had gotten “caught in the act.”
I felt convicted.
The difference between perseverance and obstinacy is that one comes from a strong will, and the other from a strong won’t. Henry Ward Beecher
Hm…something to ponder over today, as I shuffle around the house.
By the way, not once did my loving husband say, “I told you so.”
He’s a wise man.